It never ends well with pasty white people, tailgating, dancing and a video camera. The good folks at Black Heart, Gold Pants have the Nit fans, um, unironically rocking out to what I think is Miley Cyrus or some other bubblegum pop. The true embarrassment: the flags in the background. A confederate flag? Really?

Our friends at Marquette are celebrating being named the top Catholic party school by Playboy. Suck on that Notre Dame, Boston College and even Duquesne.

And closer to us, the Big East is taking action with unpaid consultant Paul Tagliabue? What?

The official party line is that Tagliabue will help assess the league’s strengths and weaknesses and help in negotiating future TV and other media rights deals.

TNIAMM has a list of possible ideas Tags may float. To which I’ll add the idea of moving WVU to Maryland for a larger TV market.

In a way he is perfect for working with the Big East. A Georgetown grad from the NFL trying to help in a college football issue. How can this not fail?

But there could be some other action. There has been speculation that the Big East is going after Maryland, and there has even been talk that it could send out an olive branch to see if Boston College would come back. Throw in Central Florida as a partner in that state with South Florida, add that to a core Northeast group centered around Rutgers, Pitt, Syracuse, Connecticut, and West Virginia, and you might have something.

Any inclusion of Atlantic Coast Conference schools probably would happen only if a league such as the Southeastern Conference dipped in. If the ACC lost schools such as Clemson, Georgia Tech, Florida State, or Miami, Maryland and BC might be more inclined to look for safe haven in the Northeast.

Yesterday, SEC commissioner Mike Slive said his league would be proactive.

Critics suggest that the Big East is too big as a basketball league at 16 teams. What about 20?

“Who is to say we couldn’t go to 20 teams in basketball, but not have one 20-team league, but a league with pods of four or five teams?’’ said Marinatto. “You have to think strategic alliances — what strategic alliances could we create?

…

“We need a new way of thinking. Strategic thinking. We need to be proactive rather than reactive, and develop our assets. Paul’s theory is, ‘Think long-term, think over the horizon.’ ‘Out-of-the-box thinking,’ Jim is always saying to me, ‘You have to think differently.’

“So hopefully Paul is going to help us think differently.’’

Right. Because after the Big East and ACC would theoretically get raided, teams from the ACC would line-up for an unstable hybrid conference that has gotten less money in TV contracts. The Big East football teams would have no interest in going to the ACC.

/weeps into keyboard.